Why I hate Sachin Tendulkar? Still wish for Bharat Ratna!

Everytime the day starts off with the dazzling smile when I dream about sachin..He is the guy who made the whole nation stand on their feet.There are reasons to hate him…These are some to the person who lived his last 21 years in loving him…

1. He always plays a brilliant innings before my exam and hence doesn’t let me study. 

2. Every time that I think of becoming an atheist, he gets into the nineties and I have no choice but to pray.

3. Every time I take a resolution not to bite my nails, he gets into the nineties and I am left with no choice but to chew on my nails.

4. He costs way too much on ‘super selector’ but since I have to pick him, the rest of my team gets weakened.

5. During a match, invariably when I want to go to the bathroom, he hits a boundary and hence I have no choice but to sit and watch the replay. Even my father/friends wont allow me to change the sit when Sachin is batting. No one cares about my agony.

6. As soon as I convince myself that God does not exist, he plays a straight drive and proves me wrong.

7. He brings the whole country to a standstill whenever he bats.

8. And the last and the biggest reason why I hate Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar … He is going to retire sometime in the future .. A slightest thought about his retirement brings tears in my eyes .. When he will retire, I feel that my life will come to a complete standstill .. How will I live without watching him on the field, without seeing him scoring tons and tons of runs, without hearing his baby voice .. Uffff , why Sachin why ?? .. Why were you born In India and why did you play cricket ?? .. I just love you so much that we cant see you going ..

As they say, commit all your crime when Sachin is batting, coz even GOD is watching his batting. That he can feel more pain than the youngest team member and the oldest fan, is a fact that deserves a story by itself. But for me, that is enough to forget my pain and stand in unreserved applause for the man who makes me feel more Indian than any other. So true !! Hats off to the master !! I strongly recommend and pray for Bharat Ratna to him.

One word that can make you RICH

I am sure you are all dying to hear what is this word…..well the word is NO. Nahi chahiye. Nyet. Nein. Vendam. Nako. Nathi Jothu. Do not want…..
the single word is NO. When I was reading an article recently I saw an article with similar headlines…it was an article in Newsweek and it said ‘One word Can Save Your Life: No’.Make no mistake this article was written by a doctor. She was not trying to save on deductibles, she was not trying to save money….AND THEY WERE APPLYING it to THEIR LIVES.
I could not but nod my head in agreement.
Cut. Come to India. With so many financial planners, quasi financial planners, quacks, banks, life and general insurance companies, mutual funds, portfolio advisors, portfolio managers, etc. fairly obviously somebody would have got you!
It is also so difficult NOT TO SEE THE ADVANTAGES when confronted by a good salesman (hopefully trained by me!!). Who can deny the need for focus, asset allocation, pension plan, child plan, neighbour’s wife plan, own mother in hospital plan, funeral plan, broken dentures plan, cancer plan, kidney failure plan, tiger eating you on the highway plan, ….- given the right name, selling it to the retail ‘prospect’ seems like selling toothpaste.
If you have teeth, you have to buy toothpaste, right?
So if you have a child you need a child plan, if you have a body you should have a medical plan, if somebody you knew got cancer, you need a cancer plan. Like they say anybody with a forehead thinks he can plan, so be it! If you will retire you need a retirement plan. ….so on and so forth.
So you agree to a Wealth plan, a Child plan, a pension plan, a medical insurance plan, an endowment plan, a ULIP, and an income replacement plan. Then the next word ‘Asset allocation’…sir you need to be in equities, gold, land, bonds, bank fixed deposits, post office savings, ppf, blah blah blah. Of course you need a few credit cards too.
Then the other word ‘leveraging’. So you need a home loan, a car loan, a personal loan (taken to make the down payment of the house which you anyway cannot afford!), a travel or foreign tour plan, children’s education loan, OMG these guys are innovative are they not?
Then the dreaded word diversification again. Large cap fund, banking fund, pharma fund, gold fund, midcap fund, small cap fund, elss.
Now that you have said yes to all this — he says sir you need to be in different fund houses too — so a Hdfc, Prudential Icici, Reliance, ….and a few more fund houses as per the distribution targets of the ‘advisor’.
So now you have a fairly simple request converted to 4 pages of holdings, some as a SIP, some ULIPs, ….and the client is completely confused.
Frankly what does the customer need?
Well if he has the ability, need and willingness to invest in education he should look at a couple of well managed multi cap funds like Hdfc top 200, Hdfc equity fund, Pru I discovery, Franklin India Bluechip…one term plan, one credit card..or to make it even simpler an index fund.
And sir do not invest in a lumpsum — do a systematic investment plan, a systematic transfer plan, a trigger option, a variable investment plan, a weekly transfer, a monthly transfer plan……..another list of options!
Once he has the basics in place, he should learn the art of say NO. No to channels, magazines, websites, blogs, planners, …just keep it simple dude.
Read the article and you will be able to relate to the financial world what that article says about the Medical world.
PS: My doctor has kept me off medicines for the past 28 years. I love him. Not sure if I can say about all the doctors….I have a few friends, a few clients, a few readers of my blog, …..I just drew a parallel from a Newsweek article to our noble profession of advise!